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I'm a goddamn marvel of modern science.

Death by sleeping bag.

I like:
Asian food, Jewish people, Michael Caine, California, bookstores, fat camp, musicals, theatre, correcting people's grammar, watching bad horror movies, Sega Genesis, laughing, really bad jokes, Dunkaroos, the word "countenance", David Bowie, Jungle Speed, squirrels, and Chipotle.

I don't like:
sunburn, Texas, bad drivers, humanity, falling off pedestals, walking into glass walls and/or stop signs, math, giving directions, the movie Deadbirds, and SPIDERS.

I'm a bouncy, headstrong, redheaded ball of sass.

I love to read. I'm sarcastic, mildly obsessive, offensive, neurotic, and bursting with fruit flavor.

And I have impossibly small hands.

I hate Christmas lights.